The BIG Girls Code Secret to Building Confidence
I get asked often about how I’m so confident. A lot of the confidence folks perceive, comes from the strength, the perseverance, & the power I draw from my family, my culture, & my history. As a Central American, I come from a long line of war survivors. I wasn’t born to kneel but to hold my head high with pride because I am alive!!! Carrying yourself with pride & grace is a resistance strategy. It is an act of defiance. No one tells you this growing up, but you learn by watching how your family moves. You learn that none of us are supposed to be alive, therefore every breathe we take is a breathe of resistance & rebellion. We are strong and confident because the lost generations live & shine through us. We honor them when we stand up tall & we honor ourselves. To me, family, culture, & history is the secret behind Divadom.
But I didn’t always see things this way. When I was 11, we moved from Guatemala to the US & I struggled with the US’s imposition of beauty standards & becoming a teen. As my curves continued to grow in all the right places, my Salvadoran grandmother & aunt were very vocal about how gorda I was. My confidence plummeted.
As mujeres we have to start believing that we are beautiful! If we don’t think kindly of ourselves how can we expect others to be kind to us? I know it’s hard, believe me I lived in self-hate for a long time. But try practicing looking in the mirror and really look at yourself. Find one thing you love about yourself, a freckle, a dimple, your eyes. Compliment that part of yourself out loud, believe it, and let that truth sink into your bones. If you need to write it down and tape it on your mirror as a reminder, do it. I started this exercise when I was 14 and battling an eating disorder and depression. As the months and years go by you may find that the things you love about yourself start growing and they become your truth. It sounds silly but in this small act of kindness you are nurturing yourself, feeding your soul by showing yourself the self-love you’re starved for.
I am a working progress. I still struggle to be confident in my life when it comes to school. I struggle to believe I’m smart enough & good enough to be in a space that wasn’t designed for people like me. It hurts. But little by little in surrounding myself by nurturers I’m getting stronger & sharing my voice is not as hard.
People in our lives will inevitably hurt us and say mean things to bring us down. Thats why I want you and me to be kinder to ourselves and each other and thats how we will begin healing each other, ourselves, letting our love grow! As Gloria E. Anzaldua said, “I change myself, I change the world”. The big girls code revolution, starts at home in front of a mirror.
❤❤❤
La Chica Mas Fina(Photo: Jackie Caraves; Pants: Torrid, Top: Eloquii)
“The more they told me: you’re a girl, you can’t paint graffiti, you can’t go to subways, because you’re a girl, you’re a mere female; I had to stand up and just shut them up.” —Lady Pink
Graff feminist OG
(via xicanadecorazon)
my new fav film short! please watch..only 4mins! :)
Title: Weighting
